12 Things That Happen When You Stop Trying to Please Toxic People

The past year has been a journey toward Living Well and of learning firsthand that emotional healing doesn’t always come easily.

Sometimes, the people who are supposed to love us most, end up causing us indescribable pain and repeated heartache.

When you take that big and awful step of pulling back emotionally and physically it can be devastating to say the least. But…to everything there is a season and joy will come after a little while.

And you learn a lot of lessons you wish you never had. But you also grow in amazing ways.

1. You start to find yourself. Like who you actually ARE!

2. You realize they never loved you in the first place.

3. You become less self-conscious and more self-confident.

4. You realize that toxic people are actually deeply selfish and prideful to their own detriment. And you realize that life is too short to fill it up with excuses for their bad behavior.

5. You find that the Bible actually talks about toxic people a lot: in scripture they are called Fools.

6. The “record of wrongs” they keep on you and drag out whenever you displease them starts to go dim…because all those moments happened so long ago and you can actually heal from the pain when you stop letting it repeatedly hurt you.

7. God places new relationships in front of you that help heal the hurt.

8. You start to feel happy for more than one day at a time.

9. The people in your life who already love you, and love Jesus, and have healthy relationships, agree with your choice to step back and reassess. And they encourage you to heal. And they tell you you are worth the blood of Jesus, and not worth the words of liar.

10. You start to thrive.

11. You find that joy is easier to sustain.

12. You learn it’s possible to grieve the loss of someone who is still breathing.

Press on. Find support. Build healthy relationships and refuse to let someone treat you like dirt.

Because when the lights go dim and the sun shines bright you will find PEACE and REST in the journey of healing all those dark wounds.

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